Some time ago I was asked “Why chastity? What is it about it that gets you going?” and I have been mulling it over. The person who asked had no idea such a thing even existed prior to that conversation and was both confused and a bit horrified and I think I failed at properly explaining it at the time. None the less, the question stuck in the back of my head.
There are several layers to it for me really and I think thats why its taken me so long to pin it down. Sadism, romance, and control, in no particular order.
Sadism is traditionally defined as enjoyment from inflicting pain on others. When you say sadist , most people picture flogging, spanking and what not. For me , its a much broader scope. While I do very much enjoy the traditional definition of sadism , consensual infliction of discomfort would be a better way to describe it for me. Consensual is a must. Its no fun for me at all if they aren’t having fun too. The discomfort aspect could be damn near anything. However, when it comes to chastity, it is absolutely the T&D. The squirming, the sounds, the pained look on their faces just make my little black heart giddy.
Grumpy and I are far from what anyone would call romantic. On the occasions where either of us inadvertently say something ‘sweet’ to the other, we tease about being a closet romantic. We don’t fawn over one another or gaze into each others eyes or send gooey messages declaring our unyielding love. I think its safe to say that we both find those things annoying and a bit immature. We show our affection to one another in different ways. He recently brought home 3 different kinds of gourmet olives for me. He does not like olives at all but knows that I love them. It was also clear that he put some thought into which ones he got. I find that far more romantic than some useless bauble or flowers. When it comes to chastity, I can’t think of anything that could be more romantic. It may sound like a generalization but I feel as though men define their manhood with their penis. So for me, there is no greater gesture of love than “Will you control my penis?” When I am offered keys ( that I actually want) I get what I assume is the same feeling other women get when they are offered an engagement ring.
Its no secret I am a control freak and I put a lot of effort into controlling it which in a certain way feeds it. There are a few areas of my life where I let my control freak flag fly proudly though and if you have seen any of the Chastity Assignments I have come up with for Grumpy, its clear that this is one of those areas.
While I feel this goes without saying, chastity is just plain sexy as hell.
There are likely a few more facets to this but I think that really covers at least the basics. When I was originally asked ‘ Why’ I really had nothing to respond with. I think I told him something like “why do you like steak or sex or biking?”
In, other news. Grumpy does not know the end date of his current assignment and asked for the first time last night ” Am I at least half way? ” I knew he was going to ask eventually and I was expecting it far sooner than this. Of course I refused to tell him as that would defeat the purpose by giving him some sense of gauge on it. He playfully argued it which was pretty cute.